Now that summer is almost over and the heat and humidity have decreased, I have found myself looking back over the past year. The beginning of the new year was difficult with joint replacement surgery and the financial burden that placed on my already screaming wallet. But as I look back over the past nine months, and the years behind me as well, I realize that recovering from anything, be it surgery, loss through death of a loved one, divorce or financial problems, it is all in how you feel about yourself whether you come out of it with painful scars that cause perpetual remorse or lessons learned and move on with your life.
Many of you who know me know that I lost my husband to lung cancer nearly nine years ago; this was the most painful time of my life and I didn't think I would ever get over it. With the memories that Don and I made to sustain me and the unconditional love he had shown me for the thirteen years we were together I made it through those years. This past weekend I found some pictures of some of those memories and it reminded me of where I had been and where I am now; the people that have passed through my life and those who still remain. I will always be grateful to everyone who has touched my life for I have gained something from each and every one of them; the good and the bad made me what I am today: a strong and independent woman of middle age perfectly capable of taking care of herself come what may.
In my youth I lacked self esteem and feared being rejected, feeling that I was unworthy of being loved and thinking that I had to do what ever I was told to make sure I was loved. This drove me to marry the first man that said he loved me at the age of twenty. What a disaster that was! We were separated within a year and divorced by the second year. As I mentioned earlier the good and the bad helped shape the person I am and how you feel about yourself will determine how you handle a given situation. Over the years I have learned this one truth: "TOMORROW WILL BE A BETTER DAY SO DON'T LOSE HOPE!" If tomorrow isn't what you want it to be, then do something about it and the next day will be better.
There is no reason a person must settle for less than what they truly want. Not even the lack of financial support should stop you. If you need money and you can't find a job, use your own imagination to create your own income whether it is as simple as baby sitting your neighbors kids, taking in outside laundry or offering to cut your neighbor's grass on Saturday evenings or as complicated as starting your own home based business, there are ways to improve your situation.
If money isn't your problem and human companionship is what you crave, try keeping a smile on your face even when you don't feel as though you have anything to smile about. A simple smile and a cheerful "Good Morning" will be more readily accepted and appreciated by friends and strangers alike than a constant frown and foul language. The old saw "Misery loves company" is so true, but the opposite side of that coin is "A smile is more contagious than the flu"
A friend once told me something that literally changed the way I felt about myself and I am going to share that bit of advice with you in hopes that it will help you feel better about yourself:
"People will treat you the way you teach them to treat you."
Huh! Imagine that! If you treat yourself badly others will pick up on that. If you treat yourself with love and respect, they will pick up on that as well.
I hope my little ramble has helped you have a better day.
Lots of love